October 8

Good morning.

Reading today's daily Bible selections, Colossians 3:18-21 grabbed my attention. In this brief passage, God delivers specific marching orders - distinct - simple - but oh so difficult to put into action.

When Terry and I taught Family Connections Sunday School, one of our best series was called Love and Respect. We learned about the importance of women UNCONDITONALLY respecting our husbands. Respect. Not just love. Love comes natural for us. Respect does not. We have to work at it. Respect isn't due to him because he earned it. The saying that "he (or she) has to earn my respect" is not Biblical. We learned about the importance of men UNCONDTIONALLY loving their wives. Love. Not just respect. You see, respect comes more natural for a man. Love does not necessarily...at least not like we may want it to look like. Marriage takes work, but the dividends are priceless!

Now God loves the husband/wife relationship, but there's something more He's after. He's after godly offspring! So what does Colossians say about children? Obey Mommy and Daddy. Of course, we know that is much easier commanded than carried out. Folly is bound up in the heart of a child. That's why it takes on-going discipline to overcome the natural rebelliousness of our hearts & in our children's hearts. But the passage doesn't stop by instructing our children alone. God actually instructs fathers (and mothers) also. "Do not provoke or embitter your children, or they will become discouraged."

A few years ago, I was struggling w/my oldest daughter. She'd been hard-hearted and fought me about anything and everything all day long and had been in a season of doing so. Since she and I are both strong-willed, she pushed against me and I pushed back in the name of discipline. My heart was to train my daughter to do what was right and godly. My manner was legalistic and lacked grace. It was a Wed night. I finally told her she could not go to Children's Church which she loved. I told her she would have to stay with me in my class. Well, of course, she hardened up even more. So we sat in the fellowship hall next to each other at a table. I don't remember if I said anything else or just sat quietly with her and watched her. But after a while, she broke and revealed what was in her heart. Tears streamed down her face (and mine) as she told me that she just couldn't be good enough and didn't even think she'd ever make it into heaven. All of our legalistic, well-meaning training and disciplining had discouraged our sweet daughter.

Of course, Terry and I did not intentionally provoke or discourage our daughter. But it happens. And God cautions us not to let it happen for all of our own good. Be watchful, Parents. Know your children's hearts. If you've caused one to be discouraged either young or old, I encourage repent and go to him/her and make it right as we had to. Know each other's hearts. Love and respect in a marriage and in a parent to child relationship makes life much richer and rewarding.

Have a blessed weekend and enjoy your family!

Blessings,
Rolanda Green
Hillcrest Children's Minister